Moral Low Ground


Fully-Inserted Dessert Fork Removed from Elderly Australian Man’s Penis

fork in penis

An elderly Australian man in search of novel methods of sexual self-gratification required emergency medical attention to remove a 4 inch (10cm) dessert fork from his urethra. reports the 70-year-old Canberra man, whose name has not been released, was rushed to Canberra Hospital after he fully inserted the fork into the hole of his penis. Doctors could not see the utensil, but they could feel it inside him, and it showed up clearly on an X-ray.

According to a report published in the International Journal of Surgery Cases titled “An Unusual Urethral Foreign Body”:

A 70-year-old man presents to the Emergency Department with a bleeding urethral meatus following self-insertion of a fork into the urethra to achieve sexual gratification. Multiple retrieval methods were contemplated with success achieved via forceps traction and copious lubrication.

The report adds that motivations for such “auto-erotic” insertions “ought to be explored in light of possible underlying psychological or psychiatric conditions.” It also notes other objects which have been inserted in penises, including pens, safety pins, telephone cables, glue, cocaine, straws, marbles, light bulbs, carrots, and snakes, to name but a few.

According to a recent study of urethral insertion titled “Putting Lead in Your Pencil: Self Insertion of an Unusual Urethral Foreign Body for Sexual Gratification,” the “urological consequences of this type of behavior can be significant and implications for patients can be serious including death from sepsis.”

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One Comment

  1. wildAugust 20, 2013 at 5:33 amReply

    I think the willing, painful, irretrievable neo-conservative population in the United States of Pet Owners is also afflicted much like this guy from Australia.

    Q. What is the difference between an idiot, and an neo-conservative idiot?

    A. The number of prongs on their salad fork.


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